Mowing of the grass

Dearest friends on the internet,
I hope this message finds you enjoying a lovely Saturday night.

I think possibly you should make sure you are sitting down for what I am about to announce. The woman actually mowed my yard today! Of course she whined and moaned the entire time. “It’s too hot!” “I need to rest!” “Oh look! A squirrel!” It took her double the time it should have to get it done but it’s finished...at least for today. There’s no telling when she will do it again.

I was hoping to get more work done on my book today than I did but I had far too many interruptions. First I had to supervise the woman mowing. That took forever. Then, Miss Elsie Fallulah Graves decided she was going to open up a can of whoopass on Sammy and chase him through the house. I did my best to referee. Miss Elsie is our top cat. She will be 17 years old in just a couple of weeks. She is one tough broad and, in all honesty, she kind of freaks me out. She has a weird obsession with Anderson Cooper. I just try to stay out of her way. I think she kind of freaks Sammy out, too, because he lets out a loud girly scream whenever she starts ripping him a new one.

The woman has been whining about having a sinus headache. I think she’s trying to get out of having a fuzzy sock nite. I guess I will have to offer a trade off...I will administer purr therapy in exchange for belly rubs and a good black and white movie.

I hope you all have a good night’s rest. Remember, you will not have bad dreams if you wash your hands so...you know what to do...go wash ‘em right now.

Very truly yours,
Bob